i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
