kristin has been a bad kristin
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
