just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
