What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Someone shit on the floor
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize