thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
