Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
he fucked my hip out of place.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Randomize
