Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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