At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize
