I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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