Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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