But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize