Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
