I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize