and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
