But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize
