A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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