i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
