Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
