it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
