im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
