In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
