Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
FUCK WHALES
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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