there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
