the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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