Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
