At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Sext me about skeletons
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
