oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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