I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
