are you still at the devil's house?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize