You're completely useless in the revolution.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
