come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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