Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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