I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
