I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
from now on my penis is your penis
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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