Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
