I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
