The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize