I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
