so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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