Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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