Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize
