Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
