Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
And then my night got REAL pukey
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
