It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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