I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
