my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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