In America we eat man semen.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize