I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
