I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
