I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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